Prepared and Waiting with Eager Expectation

I was 19 when I got married and I was all about the details.  I knew exactly how I wanted our wedding to look, and I spent 8 months making sure it was picture perfect.  I had a binder in which I kept copies of paper detailing every minute, each role, position, and job for everyone that was involved in our wedding.  I made sure everyone involved recieved a copy.  Each paper included what the persons role was, role description, places and times they would need to be aware of.  Everything was perfectly planned down to the last minute detail.  In modern day lingo, I probably would have been called a bridezilla!  I wanted everyone to be well informed and I had made up my mind that I definately wasn't going to have "one of those weddings" where nothing was organized.  It was going to be perfect.

I recall, instead of resting in the fact that everything was well planned out down to the crossing of the last "t" and the dotting of the last "i", I was still caught up in all of the details.  I did not rest that day.  I did not enjoy the day with the excited expectancy of marrying my true love.  I was busy making sure the bridesmaids bows were tied just so on their dresses and their hair was done with flowers in.  I was sidetracked with the annoyance of realizing the florist had misinturrpreted my vision for the bridal table center piece and for the bridesmaids bouquets. The reception area needed to be decorated also.  I don't remember who, but someone finally pulled me away from decorating and said, "you need to get ready!" 

I was so wrapped up in the details that I missed out on my own preperation.  I missed out on the joy and delight of the day and the great anticipation of seeing my husband-to-be for the first time in 24 hours.  I was ready to get married because the details were ready, but my heart and my mind were not prepared.

I tell you all this, becuase I have found myself in a similiar position recently.  Not one of marriage, of course, as I am still married to that wonderful man who loved me even in all of my frenzy!  I know there is a plan for my life and a calling.  But, I often feel ansy and restless.  Like a steed chomping at a bit, trembling and ready to take off as soon he hears the word from his master.  I often feel discouraged because I can't see anything happening.  I cry out to God,"please show me, reveal to me what you are doing.  I don't want to miss out on  your calling!  I don't want to miss out on what you are doing!"  I feel anxious and afraid.

Yesterday morning was like that for me.  And AGAIN for the umpteenth time I heard God say to me, "Rest."  Urg!!!  I don't wanna rest!  I said, "I am afraid that if I stay still I am going to miss out on the action; on what you are doing!"  He said, "if you are running around, YOU ARE  going to miss it."  As I began getting ready for the day, God brought to my mind another word that He gave to me awhile ago.  It was simply, "be ready."  He never told me for what, and believe me, I asked!  He simply responded to my question with, "just be ready."  It made me think about the 10 virgins in Matthew 25.  5 were ready to meet the bridegroom and 5 were not.  I asked myself the question- "Am I ready?  Am I in the process of preparing myself or am I so caught up in the details of what it is, what it will look like, and if I will miss it that I am forgetting to get prepared?"  This is when I started to think about my wedding and the one thing I would have changed - having my heart prepared to meet my love with great excitement and anticipation.  I missed out on that, because I was bothered by details that ultimately did not matter.

I don't want to repeat that same mistake again.  I want my heart to be ready.  I want to be Mary and not Martha. (Luke 10:38-42)

My preperation should not revolve around the why, how, what, who or when.  My preperation needs to revolve around Christ.  Just as a bride's preperation should revolve around her true love; her bridegroom.  I want you to picture this with me:

A beautiful young girl awakens on the day of her wedding.  She lights out of bed and skips to the bathroom to shower.  She picks out her favorite scented body wash and washes herself, excited to present herself to her love.  After her shower, she dries herself off and lotions her body with scented oils and perfumes, hoping that her soon to be husband will be swept away by her beauty.  She dresses herself in a beautiful white gown and sits with growing anticipation as her hair is combed, curled and elegantly styled.  Her veil is gently put in place by her mother; its softness carressing her cheeks.  Everything in place, she carefully steps back and gazes at herself in the full length mirror.  Her breath is  taken away by the vision she sees.  Butterflies dance inside of her.  She is giddy and filled with excited anticipation as she waits, prepared with eager expectation to see her one true love!

Just as a bride prepares herself for her bridegroom, so I must also prepare myself for Christ.  I must wash myself with the word of God.  Renewing my mind daily in His truth. (Romans 12:2, Eph. 5:26-27) I need to clothe myself in the armour of God and with the purity of His righteousness. (Eph. 6:10-18, Rev. 19:7-8)  With everything in place, I will step back and gaze at myself through His eyes; my breath taken away by the vision I see.  Butterflies dancing inside of me, giddy and filled with excited anticipation as I stand prepared, and waiting with eager expectation!

Romans 8:22-39
vs. 24-25  For in this hope we were saved.  But hope that is seen is no hope at all.  Who hopes for what he already has?  But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.
vs. 28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
Isaiah 40:27-31
vs. 31 but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength.  They will soar on wings like eagles;  they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.